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Just Some Shit I Thought And Wrote.

Forgive me if I don’t forgive You…

Shattered dreams & dismantled promises is all I have left
Now I’m wondering if I should go right or left
I don’t think I got anything left
Nor do I want anything else

So forgive me If I don’t forgive you

You ask me : Will I ever get it back?
I don’t know
Do I want it back?
You gave it away
Was it really ever mine to start with?
I am not certain —

So forgive me If I don’t forgive you

I’m left in the darkness,
with only a rhythmless heartbeat & misdirected thoughts to lead my way…
I - AM - LOST-
WILL - I - BE - FOUND -?
I - DONT - WANT - TO - BE - FOUND

Please forgive me If I don’t forgive you

Colourless colours is what I is…
Decaying from within…
DEVOURED…
TORN…
FEELING? — Nothing

You want my forgiveness…?

Forgive me / I can’t forgive you….

The Parody Of Vanity , Evolution & Attraction

Before I even start with the article I must thank the blog author that inspired it… I don’t know the person all I know is that they go by the NhlanhlaMsi on twitter. I came across this blog “Vanity Street Chronicles” via a twit by a friend.

N.B. This article expresses the personal views of I and I alone, it is not intended to harm or judge anyone what/so/ever in any/way/possible.

Here goes[...]

So what is Vanity exactly, well according to a web defination Vanity is the quality of being valueless or futile. Valueless LET’s crunch that down. What brings values in an person? Who is there to decide what is value and what is not? Over the past couple of months I have been trying to rid myself of a certain lifestyle that is considered by some as “valueless” .

So what is this valueless lifestyle?

Thanks to my latest ex-girlfriend I have found a lot of valuelessness in clubs and parties or anything that involves ALCOHOL + WOMEN + LOUD HOUSE MUSIC, for simple reasons ofcourse… excessive consumption of alcohol (I’m not saying I quit drinking)… For many of us (I refer to us because to a certain degree I still play in this space) there are no restriction to how much we take in, if the mood is rite, what the heck, keep them coming, this ofcourse lead to the impediment of basic rational, decisions that are taken in a state of intoxication are far from what we would generally do when in our normal state of thought. We always seem to put ourselves in situations we do not desire to be in when sober, but because our chemical composition has been altered we fail to use our rational…

This is evident when we ask ourselves question the day after…

If I were not drunk would I have slept with that boy/girl[s] ? If I were not drunk would I still have not used a condom ? If I were not drunk would I have still done that? yeah what are your answers … No | No & No… Now Show Me Value Here? But then again it goes back to the question what is value? Is what I say is valuable, valuable to you too, what is the ration?  So much for that…

In the article : Single And Sexless : Dear Mojo the author asks a very simple question “When Did Getting Laid Become So Hard”, what’s my answer “Getting Laid Become Hard When Vanity Became The New Black”… which bring me to this here thing called EVOLUTION.

Once again it leads me back to my latest ex (hate doing this)… Over the years I have been on the frontlines of “valuelessness” | “vanity” … but could never ATTRACT girls in that space, I was always encountered with girls that are too sweet, too kind, too perfect, girls who do not know what is even done in a club… “Hey babes wanna go clubbing tonight - What is that babe…” Which could never gel “club” | “church” … geez I’m too hung on sunday to even think Church…  Now things have switched… I seek not to club anymore, I seek for random sex, not … then what do I get… hey looky here we gotz ourself a club banger… WTF … I don’t have time for this shit, This isn’t wat I asked for…

Do men become more virtuous as they get older? Do women become more vain as they get older? I don’t know!!!

This got me think about the Law Of Attraction, and the saying “You are, what you attract” . When are the basis and fundamentals of this applicable and when are they not? Does VANITY ATTRACT VANITY or does VANITY ATTRACT prey to nibble on.

Well I wouldn’t be suprise if you cannot makes sense of this or find it valueless… That’s just the vanity in me!!!!

Thanks again to the author of Vanity Street Chronicles for the inpiration

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